My introduction to Motherhood was through both of my step children. I didn't become a mother until 2-3 years after meeting my step children. I must say that being introduced to motherhood through my step kids was very interesting. They taught me a lot. In the beginning of my relationships with my step children I thought being a mother was easy! I remember thinking, This isn't hard at all. Boy was I wrong. Now I realize I was wrong about a lot of things, feelings, rules, etc. It took a lot of time and communication to build strong relationships with my step children and their mother's.
I'm writing this open letter to the woman who I share Mother's Day with to show my appreciation. Thank you for allowing me to share this special day with you guys.
To: My stepson's mother
We have truly come a long way! We've gone from being cordial, being enemies, and later becoming friends. We taught each other so much when it comes to friendship, being a mother, and being in a blended family. We've grown from immature kids to women. It's still crazy to me that we learned how to disagree and leave it at that, without letting it go any further. Thats true growth from the young girls that were once rolling around on the ground fighting. I could write a book (Coming soon) but I'll keep it short.
I just want to say thank you! Thank you for allowing me to be so involved and hands on with your baby. I know having me around and being so involved wasn't easy in the beginning. Not to mention I always had something to say, lol always offering my opinion. You're such a strong woman and I really respect, and love you. Thank you for always including me. Thank you for considering my feelings in his life. Thank you for sharing him with me and making me feel just as important. Thank you for supporting me and joining me on blogs, live Q&A's, or anything I ask! Thank you! You're an Amazing Mother and I honor you! Happy Mother's Day!
To: My Step Daughters Mother
From the beginning you've always welcomed me into your child's life. Always spoke well about me. I remember feeling like I would never be able to fill your shoes in her eyes. I was afraid of failing her. I remember being upset with you because there was a period of time when she was so angry with me because she didn't understand your absence. One day in particular she was not having a good day. I must have asked her 20 times was she ok or what was wrong. I guess I asked her one to many times and she yelled out I WANT MY MOM!
See a lot of people don't talk about these real moments in a blended families, but I'm going to speak on it because it was a true learning experience. I was doing everything in my power to be the best mother I knew how to be. I was going about everything all wrong! I quickly learned that I could never fill the void that she felt, but instead I started to create a new space in her heart. Once she started to see that I wasn't trying to replace you that allowed us to build a beautiful bond!
Thank you for trusting me to raise her. I remember you saying to me one day saying "she really needs you, you got this." That meant the world to me. Your strength is unmatched. Knowing that I could offer her something that you weren't able to at the time, and allowing me to take full control shows so much strength. You could have easily took another approach. Thank you for blessing me with an amazing daughter and allowing me to take her in as my own. I love you! Happy Mother's Day!
To: My Daughters Godmom
This may be the hardest one to write. Where do I start? I felt the need to include you in this open letter because I ignored the conversation for far to long. The relationship you have with this crazy little girl of ours is beyond me. You have also created your own space in her heart. I never told you this but I'm so grateful that you stepped up in her life at a very early age and took care of her like your child. To be honest in the beginning I really didn't understand your relationship with her or why you were so protective, but I do now. At one point it was just you and her and thats very hard to let go of.
Even though you and her mother didn't work out, you continued to love and care for her unconditionally. Thank you! Thank you for EVERYTHING that you do! Everything that you did in the past. And everything that you will do in the future! Your heart is so pure and you have taught me that the love you have for her will never go away. Thank you for mothering her when no one else was around! Thank you! I love you, Happy Mother's Day!
It takes a village. I would have never imagined my village being this way, but this village works for our family. Happy Mother's Day to everyone out there that plays any kind of motherly role! You are all amazing in your own ways! I value you! Happy Mother's Day.