One of the biggest mistakes I've made as a step-parent
I was 27 when I officially became a step mom and there has been a lot of trails and errors. Step-parenting does not come easy and there is no guide to being the perfect stepparent because everyone's family is different. I'm going to share the biggest mistake I've made as a (soon to be) STEP-parent. Remember this is a no judgement zone 😬
To me the biggest mistake of all was me fighting my stepchild's mother. Yes, physically fighting. I know I know... How did I let that happen? Well, this was before I officially became a step-parent and was very immature. See at that point I decided to let all the negative things that were going on control me(big NO NO), I also allowed past issues and drama to dictate my actions. And trust me I paid for it. After we as adults moved on and were over the situation there was someone who really didn't know how to deal with it all. Someone who paid attention to action and not words. My stepchild!
It was very hard for me to live with the fact that my child who I built this very strong bond with was very distant with me. Things just didn't feel the same. Our interactions weren't the same. The trust was gone. How could I try to hurt someone they loved so much? It took months before our relationship was back to the place it use to be and it was hard work. Like any relationship we had to rebuild, and start over. I had to apologize for what I've done wrong and express to them I wanted our relationship to go back to how it use to be. I had to show them I changed, without saying it. Children pay attention to what you do not what you say.
I'm so happy that our bond is now stronger than it has ever been. Never say never! It's never too late to fix a situation and start over. Blended families don't always start on a good foot or if it does somewhere down the line you may hit a bump in the road. Don't stay there! Communicate and Address the situation. Learn from your mistakes and life lessons and grow through it. Fighting, weather physically or verbally never solves anything. After we got up off the ground, looking foolish our problems were still right there waiting for us. Please learn from my mistake it only hurts the child to see parents act or speak negatively towards each other.
A negative mindset leads to negative actions and a positive mindset leads to positive action!